Thursday, September 17, 2009

College App. Essay Draft(Journal #10 )

We all learn new things everyday. Life holds many lessons that should be learned by everyone. There are common lessons that most people learn, but there are also lessons that only some of us learn. You can learn lessons many different ways. We usually learn lessons from being taught from someone else or by making a mistake and learning from what we did wrong. If I had to watch a child for a year, the three lessons I would teach it is to respect others/common manners, it's okay to make mistakes and to live life to the fullest.

Respect is a very common thing that we are all taught. Parents try to teach their children to respect others from when they are young. Respect is something that many people expect. To get respect from someone, you need to give respect to the person. I would teach this to any child because it's important to get respect. When giving respect, you get respect and others will trust you and be nice to you. If everyone is nice to each other and respectful to each other, the world would be a very nice place to be. I would also teach a child common manners such as always respect elders, do not swear, and say the words "please", "thank you" and "your welcome". I feel thats important because everyone knows that this is common courtesy. We all expect that someone will respect each other, and having manners is one way of showing it. Respect is very important and people sometimes forget to give it. I would teach a child that respect is something that should never be turned off or forgotten.

We all make mistakes. Whether we learn from them or not, we all do it. Most of us learn from the wrong things we do and that's why it's okay to make mistakes. No one is perfect. Making mistakes is something no one should be teased about or laughed at for because mistakes are something that help us. Mistakes aren't always good because some of us don't learn from them but overall we learn from what we did wrong because we don't want to go through the problem again. I believe this is a very valuable lesson becuase people usually make themselves feel really bad just because they made mistake. Even if you make a mistake, just change yourself so you won't have to repeat it. I would personally tell the child "mistakes are okay because we all make them and we just have to learn from it".

Life is something that is very unpredictable. We are neve garuanteed one more day of life. Shocking events happen everyday that you never thought would happen to people. No one knows when they're going to die, or when they're going to get hurt. Since life can be very short, we should all live life to the fullest. I would explain to a child that life isn't something that should be wasted because it's something that can easily be taken away from us. If we suddenly get sick or our life is at rish, we want to feel accomplished with everything we have done. We should never live with any regrets because that is a waste of time. We need to not look at our mistakes and move on for the better. Living life to the fullest is the best thing that anyone can do. We all want to be happy with our life because it can be gone in the matter of a second.

Children should be taught from young that we should all be respectful and have common manners, making mistakes are okay, and to live life to the fullest. If a child was taught that from young and applied it to their everyday life, they would be a very loving and loved person. I believed that they would die very peacefully and happy. I believe that if everyone was taught these lessons and applied it, the world would be a much better place.


3 comments:

  1. Dear Lexie,

    Good job! You had good ideas and you backed them up with what you believe and how each thing is important in life. I can also hear your voice, so make sure to keep that up. Make sure to add that sentence fluency that we learned in class, with lots of description, so you can "show not tell." Other than that, good job, and good luck with the final!!

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  2. Lexaaay (:

    I loved your topic! Your ideas, thoughts and everything else went well with it. I heard alot of "Lexy" but it was a tad bit too general. You had some grammatical errors every now and then. I know sentence fluency is a little bit difficult but no worries, I know you can manage :D But anywhos, awesome posssom! I have a feeling that the college you want to go to might see something special about you ^___^

    Love, Michelleyyy

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  3. Hi Alexis,

    I agree with Destrie and Michelle that you have selected three great lessons to teach a child. I also agree with Michelle that you could be more specific. Supporting your ideas with personal exerperiences would make the essay stronger and would also show more of "you" in the piece.

    Although both Destrie and Michelle can hear your voice in the piece, I think you need to strengthen it with more specific, personal detail.

    Voice and specific detail is especially important in this essay, where you are trying to share the "real Alexis" to the college admissions office.

    mrs s

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